Episode 16 ~ I didn’t know, but I knew… you know?
Updated: Sep 1, 2020
“Hello? ” she mumbled.
He spoke much too fast and much too loud. “Hey Care, I thought a lot about what you said. Lindsey was not the first. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I think I just thought I could keep you and fill in the blanks with what I wasn’t getting with someone else. I need to keep you in my life. You are so important to me and I hate so much that this has happened this way and that I was such a coward and I’m sorry and you’re right and this is not enough for me either and can we just be happy for each other, for I dunno, whatever comes next?” He inhaled sharply.
“Okay, you comin’ up for air?,” Carrie laughed and then with concern, “Where are you?”
“I’m out, just out,” David said sounding sad or maybe tired.
“Are you alright?”
“No…yeah, I’m fine,” he insisted. He leaned on a brick ledge on what had once been a window and rubbed his eyes. “I fucked up, babe but I knew what I was doing. It caught up to me and I want to do it right now and keep you in my life. It really means that much to me.”
“Me too. And I’ve known,” Carrie yawned and continued, “Not in the sense that I knew, but I knew, you know.”
They both laughed and for a brief second, things were normal until David sniffed, “So, we really are going to end this then?”
“Yeah.” she was all matter of fact.
“Okay, tomorrow I say we take matters into our own hands,” David ventured. This wasn’t what he wanted to do but he didn’t really want to change her either. “I’ll call you in the morning and we can write up a quick, um, statement and well simultaneously put it out there together. Talk about good P.R.”
“What, like a breakup tweet?” Carrie snorted.
“Well, not exactly but kinda I guess,” he said. “Whatever we do, we’ll do it on our…on your terms, okay?”
“Alright,” she said honestly feeling for him. “That’s not the worst idea. David, thank you. I love you, you know. I want you to be happy.”
“Me too Care Bear. Just please don’t come crying to me when some guy breaks your heart.”
“Gee, thanks.” She quipped.
“Not because I don’t care. I’ll kick his ass and …I don’t want to be on the news.” David joked.
“Okay,” she said, feeling better than she had in days. “Please get home safely. Talk to you tomorrow?”
“Yes, Night, Care.”
She hung up, dropped the phone on her bedside table and fell right back to sleep.
David turned up his collar and turned into the wind. It was cold but the chill felt good. He desperately hoped that their friendship was salvageable. They had a lot of history and had built some good things together. Their attempted romance just hadn’t been one of them. The next few weeks would be telling.